What does therapy look like?


First off, I’m not everyone’s cup of tea.  Finding the right match in a therapist is essential.  Empirical research shows the therapy relationship is the single most important part of healing.  If you’re looking for a therapist who can roll with sarcasm and f-bombs, you might be in the right place. 

Therapy isn’t sitting around whining about the past.   To move forward, we need to understand the past, but not get stuck looking in the rear view mirror.  (I know, cheezy, but true)  It’s essential to learn about experiences attached to beliefs that continue to affect you today.  It could be physical violence.  Or, you may have had the “perfect” childhood, but spent a lot of time alone because the adults in your life were working to provide said childhood.     

It takes time to get to know the parts of us that hold the keys.  Growing up we all learned coping skills that kept us safe, but are now getting in the way.  We learned to scan the room, and figure out who’s safe and who isn’t.  Fight, Flight, Freeze.  Anxiety trauma responses are learned at a young age, and held deep inside our mind, bodies and souls.   


Isn’t it just blaming your parents?

No.  God knows, as a parent, I’ve  made plenty of mistakes.  Therapy isn’t about blaming anyone.  It’s about learning who the hell WE are.  There’s no quick “blame fix” or “magic counseling wand.”  

During our first several sessions we’ll get to know one another, and decide if it’s the right fit for both of us.  We’ll focus on coping skills to manage some of the immediate stuff.  Learn the many voices of your inner critic, and tone down the volume a bit.  

Then the real work begins.  

The next level of therapy is to learn the origins of your life patterns.  This means digging deep.  Taking time to learn about family of origin, inter-generational patterns, and figure out what continues to affect your thoughts, and choices. 

Healing requires emotional investment and mutual respect.  The results can be life changing.   





Tori Corbett, LCSW

License# L10440

Counseling in Oregon

Anxiety, Anger, Trauma, Depression

  3003 Willamette St. Eugene, OR, 97405